{"id":78189,"date":"2025-09-09T04:13:12","date_gmt":"2025-09-09T08:13:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/world.edu\/?p=78189"},"modified":"2025-09-09T04:13:12","modified_gmt":"2025-09-09T08:13:12","slug":"when-youre-caught-between-yes-and-no-heres-why-maybe-isnt-the-way-to-go","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/world.edu\/when-youre-caught-between-yes-and-no-heres-why-maybe-isnt-the-way-to-go\/","title":{"rendered":"When you\u2019re caught between \u2018yes\u2019 and \u2018no,\u2019 here\u2019s why \u2018maybe\u2019 isn\u2019t the way to go"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/p>\n

Say you win a radio sweepstakes giving you two tickets to a sold-out concert the upcoming weekend. You eagerly text your friend and ask if they\u2019d like to join.<\/p>\n

Their response? \u201cMaybe.\u201d<\/p>\n

Your mood immediately turns. You feel slighted rather than joyous as you\u2019re left in limbo: Now you need to wait for your waffling friend to make a decision before you can figure out your plans for the concert.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m a consumer psychologist<\/a>\u00a0who has studied social decision-making for over a decade. And if you\u2019ve experienced anything like the above anecdote, I can tell you that you\u2019re not alone. People responding \u201cmaybe\u201d to invitations is a common yet irksome aspect of social life. Recently, my co-authors and I published a\u00a0series of studies<\/a>\u00a0examining what goes on in people\u2019s heads when they aren\u2019t sure whether to accept an invitation.<\/p>\n

Leaving your options open<\/strong><\/h4>\n

Social invitations can be a delicate dance, and people often misread what someone extending an invite wants to hear.<\/p>\n

We consistently found that people overestimate an inviter\u2019s likelihood of preferring a \u201cmaybe\u201d over a \u201cno.\u201d Moreover, they fail to realize how much more disrespected people feel when they receive a \u201cmaybe\u201d in response to their invitation.<\/p>\n

Another pattern emerged: The more someone incorrectly assumed that a host preferred a tentative response, the more likely they were to respond with a \u201cmaybe\u201d themselves.<\/p>\n

Naturally, we wanted to figure out why this awkward dynamic plays out. We found that it\u2019s largely due to something called \u201cmotivated reasoning<\/a>.\u201d Motivated reasoning occurs when a person interprets information in a biased way to arrive at a conclusion that aligns with their own wishes.<\/p>\n

In other words, invitees convince themselves that inviters want to hear \u201cmaybe\u201d instead of \u201cno,\u201d because a \u201cmaybe\u201d is better for the invitee, allowing them to leave their options open. Saying \u201cno\u201d right off the bat eliminates one\u2019s options and opens the door for FOMO, or\u00a0fear of missing out<\/a>, to emerge.<\/p>\n

Just say \u2018no\u2019<\/strong><\/h4>\n

That said, there were certain situations that made people more comfortable saying \u201cno\u201d to an invite.<\/p>\n

In one study, we had recipients of an invitation put themselves in the shoes of the person extending the invite. This made them more likely to realize that they\u2019d probably prefer a definitive answer. That is, it seemed to prevent motivated reasoning from emerging.<\/p>\n

In another study, we had participants get invited to do something they didn\u2019t want to do. We found that motivated reasoning then became irrelevant: They had no desire to keep their options open, so they were more likely to assume that a \u201cno\u201d was preferable to a \u201cmaybe.\u201d<\/p>\n

Interestingly, while invitations are a widespread aspect of social life, social scientists have only recently started studying them. For example, a 2024 study found that people tend to\u00a0overestimate the negative consequences of saying \u201cno\u201d<\/a>\u00a0to invitations. They think it will upset, anger and disappoint inviters more than is the case. This could also be part of the reason that many people fail to realize that someone extending an invitation prefers a \u201cno\u201d to a \u201cmaybe.\u201d Other research has explored whether people respond better to some\u00a0reasons for declining an invite<\/a>\u00a0over others: saying you\u2019re too busy, not great; saying you don\u2019t have enough money to make it work, much better.<\/p>\n

While navigating social situations can be tricky, our work suggests that being direct and definitive is sometimes best.<\/p>\n

It might reduce your options. But it\u2019ll keep those who invited you from being left in limbo \u2013 and maybe they\u2019ll still think of you when the next concert comes to town.<\/p>\n

Author Bio: <\/strong>Julian Givi is Assistant Professor of Marketing at West Virginia University<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Say you win a radio sweepstakes giving you two tickets to a sold-out concert the upcoming weekend. You eagerly text your friend and ask if they\u2019d like to join. Their response? \u201cMaybe.\u201d Your mood immediately turns. You feel slighted rather than joyous as you\u2019re left in limbo: Now you need to wait for your waffling […]\n… learn more→<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"author":33,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[95],"tags":[435496],"coauthors":[11733],"class_list":["post-78189","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-lifestyle","tag-decisions"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nWhen you\u2019re caught between \u2018yes\u2019 and \u2018no,\u2019 here\u2019s why \u2018maybe\u2019 isn\u2019t the way to go - World leading higher education information and services<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/world.edu\/when-youre-caught-between-yes-and-no-heres-why-maybe-isnt-the-way-to-go\/\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"When you\u2019re caught between \u2018yes\u2019 and \u2018no,\u2019 here\u2019s why \u2018maybe\u2019 isn\u2019t the way to go - World leading higher education information and services\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Say you win a radio sweepstakes giving you two tickets to a sold-out concert the upcoming weekend. 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