{"id":48548,"date":"2019-07-05T13:49:07","date_gmt":"2019-07-05T20:49:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/world.edu\/?p=48548"},"modified":"2019-07-05T13:49:07","modified_gmt":"2019-07-05T20:49:07","slug":"learn-to-say-no","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/world.edu\/learn-to-say-no\/","title":{"rendered":"Learn to say &#8220;no&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48549\" src=\"https:\/\/world.edu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/sayno.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"680\" height=\"453\" srcset=\"https:\/\/world.edu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/sayno.jpg 680w, https:\/\/world.edu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/sayno-250x167.jpg 250w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 680px) 100vw, 680px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;I&#8217;m also proud of things we did not do,&#8221; said Steve Jobs.\u00a0As we know, saying &#8220;yes&#8221; to everything leads nowhere &#8230; so why not refuse what is complicated for us or repels us?\u00a0Are we afraid of rejection?\u00a0Do we apprehend the reaction of the one to whom this answer is intended?<\/p>\n<p>In fact, the fear of displeasing is rooted in us since childhood and its roots are sprawling.\u00a0We suffer from a lack of attention and therefore we want to please at all costs.\u00a0Your mother was constantly depressed, you felt responsible for her condition, and now you have a tendency to acquiesce to any request?<\/p>\n<p>But in the long run, engorgement occurs.\u00a0The requests of others take all the place, and prevent to arrange a time for oneself.\u00a0That&#8217;s when a three-letter word becomes a sentence.\u00a0No.\u00a0By using it judiciously, and sometimes several times in a day, it is accompanied by a feeling of anger.\u00a0You then realize the time you lost with futile tasks.<\/p>\n<h4>Sense of priorities<\/h4>\n<p>As\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.theguardian.com\/lifeandstyle\/2019\/jun\/02\/want-to-improve-your-life-just-say-no\">Chloe Brotheridge<\/a>\u00a0points out\u00a0, we have to see that constantly saying &#8220;yes&#8221; is a form of manipulation, the goal of which is to be loved at all costs.\u00a0Which obviously does not work for two reasons:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>The desired effect rarely occurs.<\/li>\n<li>Performing a task that we do not want to do makes us hate the person who asks us and frustrates us because it deprives us of time that would have been better spent doing something else.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>However, as soon as one gets used to saying no, a new difficulty appears.\u00a0We are forced to face what we really want.\u00a0Does what I am asked for match me?\u00a0When it comes to unimportant queries, the questioning remains superficial but deeper questions arise when it comes to important decisions, real life choices.<\/p>\n<p>When we are asked something, it is possible that we are caught off guard.\u00a0What to do then?\u00a0Why not propose to the person to formulate his request in writing, in the form of an email for example?\u00a0That can give you time to think about it and answer it.<\/p>\n<h4>Clear language<\/h4>\n<p>As a former executive of a large publishing house, Michael Hyatt, the author of\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.fr\/gp\/product\/B07F3DM7C1\/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=lescahideli00-21&amp;camp=1642&amp;creative=6746&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;creativeASIN=B07F3DM7C1&amp;linkId=b6028bbe8c7321e7e2d27ad78fb31c42\"><em>Free to Focus<\/em><\/a>\u00a0, often receives requests to read manuscripts or meet people who need advice.\u00a0Of course, he does not have time to access all these requests.\u00a0He has prepared a model letter in which he refuses by encouraging the authors to continue their writing work.\u00a0It only remains for him to customize the first paragraph.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;The important thing,&#8221; he says, &#8220;is not to create a wait by leaving the person in uncertainty.\u00a0It is better a positive &#8220;no&#8221;, well formulated, it allows the person to organize differently.\u00a0&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>To know when to say &#8220;no&#8221; or &#8220;yes&#8221;, however, we must know what matters to us, what we do not want and what we want to accomplish.<\/p>\n<p>This is the first step Michael Hyatt advises.\u00a0Let&#8217;s be clear with our vision of productivity.\u00a0Once we know what we want, it will be easier to assess our skills and responsibilities in the light of what we (really) have to do ourselves and what would be better done by others, or by a robot.<\/p>\n<p>This exercise will then help us to make a list of things not to do rather than a list of things to do.<\/p>\n<h4>Free time<\/h4>\n<p>The time released should give us time to sleep, think, create, share and have more fun.\u00a0If we take the opportunity to do tasks that cost us, it will not help much.<\/p>\n<p>In his book,\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.fr\/gp\/product\/B07F3DM7C1\/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=lescahideli00-21&amp;camp=1642&amp;creative=6746&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;creativeASIN=B07F3DM7C1&amp;linkId=b6028bbe8c7321e7e2d27ad78fb31c42\"><em>Free to Focus<\/em><\/a>\u00a0, Michael Hyatt recalls the innovation of Henry Ford who was the first to reduce the work week to 40 hours!\u00a0This caused an incredible enthusiasm among employees who had only Sunday to rest with their family.\u00a0Their biggest surprise was that despite fewer hours worked, productivity has exploded.<\/p>\n<p>Rested, we work better, we think better.<\/p>\n<p>Even today, in most countries, the 40-hour (or even 35-hour) week model is still in effect, except that &#8230; knowledge workers, all with smartphones, remain accessible at all times. almost.\u00a0For them, the number of working hours is on the rise!<\/p>\n<p>It is not uncommon for these people to read their emails every day, including weekends, before or after their work day to avoid clutter during office hours.\u00a0It is increasingly difficult to make real breaks.<\/p>\n<p>But without breaks, especially in a world of distractions like ours, it becomes difficult to concentrate.<\/p>\n<h4>Beliefs to dispel<\/h4>\n<p>Productivity methods that help to achieve more quickly are not necessarily what will improve our lives.\u00a0The winning strategy is to accomplish what matters.\u00a0Freeing yourself of time makes sense if it allows you to accomplish these essential things and recharge your batteries.<\/p>\n<p>We sometimes think that it is impossible to do otherwise and that choices are not in our hands.\u00a0But these beliefs are our biggest brakes.\u00a0We do not take the time to put everything back on the pretext that we do not have enough time to do it, but this is a chasm.\u00a0We imagine not being sufficiently disciplined, but with good habits in place it can be done more easily than we think.<\/p>\n<p>For a part of our time, we can all be in control.\u00a0This implies, however, that we are clear with our desires and the skills to be exploited to redirect the unsuitable tasks.<\/p>\n<p>I suggest you follow Michael Hyatt&#8217;s advice, make a list of things you can not do, eliminate unnecessary tasks or redirect them by delegating them.<\/p>\n<p>This will allow you to focus on the essential tasks and recover free time to recharge your batteries in order to give the best of yourself when it comes time to get back to work.<\/p>\n<p>And, you have understood, the\u00a0<em>sine qua non<\/em>\u00a0is to refuse all requests that are not compatible with your goals or your vision &#8230; otherwise it is the others who will control your agenda.<\/p>\n<p>The exercise that I propose to you this week: to learn to say no with elegance, it is\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.cahiersdelimaginaire.com\/cahier-d-exercices\/de-sylvie-gendreau-exercice-116\">HERE<\/a>\u00a0.<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Author Bio:<\/strong> Sylvie Gendreau is aLecturer in Creativity and Innovation at Polytechnique Montr\u00e9al<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;I&#8217;m also proud of things we did not do,&#8221; said Steve Jobs.\u00a0As we know, saying &#8220;yes&#8221; to everything leads nowhere &#8230; so why not refuse what is complicated for us or repels us?\u00a0Are we afraid of rejection?\u00a0Do we apprehend the reaction of the one to whom this answer is intended? In fact, the fear of [&hellip;]\n&hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/world.edu\/learn-to-say-no\/\" class=\"more\">learn more&rarr;<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"author":33,"featured_media":48549,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[95],"tags":[295319],"coauthors":[11733],"class_list":["post-48548","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle","tag-real-life-choice"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Learn to say &quot;no&quot; - World leading higher education information and services<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/world.edu\/learn-to-say-no\/\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Learn to say &quot;no&quot; - World leading higher education information and services\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"&#8220;I&#8217;m also proud of things we did not do,&#8221; said Steve Jobs.\u00a0As we know, saying &#8220;yes&#8221; to everything leads nowhere &#8230; so why not refuse what is complicated for us or repels us?\u00a0Are we afraid of rejection?\u00a0Do we apprehend the reaction of the one to whom this answer is intended? 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